


You Will Drive With Your Evil Hand

by Teanna



Category: Angel: the Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-06-24
Updated: 2002-06-24
Packaged: 2017-10-02 21:43:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teanna/pseuds/Teanna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hit the road, Lindsey, and don't ya come back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Will Drive With Your Evil Hand

**Author's Note:**

> For the future tense challenge at the bordello. You people,you.

You will drive.

(and when you drive down Sunset Boulevard you'll turn on Dolly Parton and  
you'll sing, you'll sing, you'll sing along with Dolly)

You'll drive to Vegas, to try and find yourself by way of excessive  
gambling. You'll have a hard time playing Black Jack, you'll fail at "24",  
and you'll end up with a lot of small change, playing the one-armed  
bandits and you'll pretend to have fun, for a while.

(the guitar will be safe in the car, away from you. you think about how  
cool it would be to leave your Evil Hand in the car, how safe that would  
be then)

You'll go from Vegas, and when you're almost in Denver, you'll have an  
Insight and you'll say, aloud, in the car, you'll tell your guitar and  
your Evil Hand and Dolly, you'll tell her too, and you'll say: "I will  
find my self in Tijuana, on a beach in Mexico" and this will be true,  
you'll know it to be true, and you'll turn the car.

The car will pick that moment to break down, and you'll eventually be  
rescued by a guy in a pickup, and he'll take you to his home. It will turn  
out his home is a ranch for twenty-two men, women, and children, all  
preparing for Dooms-Day, or more exactly

(January 1, 2000)

and you will refrain from telling them "that ship has sailed".

You'll like it there, and there's a girl called May. She'll have red lips  
and, well, she'll have that, and for a while you will be happy with your  
girl and making hay and having, still having, an Evil Hand.

(but nothing lasts forever and an Evil Hand is an Evil Hand)

They'll eventually be afraid of you, you tell them - your family! - it's  
not you it's the Evil Hand, it's that, but they won't want to hear it.  
They'll put you in your car and say you gotta leave before the sun sets,  
and May, May's sweet lips, no more of that, no.

In the car, now heading for the coast again - but not Tijuana, that's  
just late, man, that's just too late - you'll think about Darla, and  
you'll play a little game so as not to fall asleep.

(D - for Dead, she was that. A - for All the things we never did. R - for  
Road, the, she hit it pretty quick "she high-tailed outta my life", L -  
for Love (plain and simple), A - for Angel. Angel Angel Angelangelangel)

You'll stop somewhere for gas and coffee, and you'll pick up your guitar  
and try to play, but all the songs your Evil Hand will play are songs of  
death, and you've had enough of that, and besides, you're scaring the  
customers.

You'll drive along the coast with your guitar and your Evil Hand and you  
won't have any fun. No fun to be had in the Lindseymobile this trip, and  
the Evil Hand will turn the steering wheel when you least expect it, it'll  
try to get you killed.

(the Evil Hand is, it appears, suicidal. or maybe it's just stupid)

And you'll know a guy who knows another guy who knows some random third  
guy. And that guy is making weapons for humans and demons alike, and he's  
calling every stupid sword Narzil or Galadriel or Humpin' Frodo, and he  
will say "man, we all have Issues. You don't like the hand, we can do  
something about it."

(see: leaving Wolfram &amp; Hart? no more of the best kind of black magic  
money can buy)

The guy will use his sharpest axe - "Theoden", for those of you at home  
keeping the score - and he will put it in his fire and the blue flames  
will run along the blade and Lindsey will know, you will know Lindsey you  
will know, that it'll cut through bones and muscle and magically healed  
nerve endings and it'll be fine.

(and you'll drink a lot of bourbon and strap the hand to a block of wood  
and you'll close your eyes and "let's see what happens")

And you'll think, I was evil once, and I got me this hand, and it sucks.  
And you'll think, I never did kiss Lilah, and what a shame I never did.  
And you'll think about Darla, about Darla being human, and about loving  
her.

And then you'll think that maybe the fire won't be enough to cauterize  
the stump, but that thought will come to you just a second too late.


End file.
